Thursday, June 10, 2010

As the days come

^i^ My Angel Jacob – 4 months in Heaven ^i^

“Our children can be our teachers; they teach us so much about life.
Life seen through our children’s eyes would make life so much easier”

It’s been 4 months since my world was turned upside down and shook till I went numb. Some days I feel the pain just gets worse, my emotions come in waves. I am missing Jacob so much; so much of my life is gone. At times I feel like I might just do better if I drift off in some corner of the universe.
It’s the little memories that hurt the most, knowing that you will never enjoy that moment with your child, that eats at me every day!
Daddy & Jacob 2005
All tatooed up,Jacob is proud of his work 2008

But of course my life has gone forward, there is so much that is keeping me busy after work and late into the night. My fundraising, there is so much I want to do, so many ideas. It makes me feel so good to know I am helping in some little way. There are some people that will never understand that. My one big motivator is I AM DOING THIS IN JACOB’S MEMORY.
To the left I have posted the awareness bracelets, they read: Always in Our Hearts Jacob 10/7/02 - 2/1/10 , I am asking $3.00 ea, 75 % will go to Megan’s Wings has help my family out so much, and so many other family’s at Kaiser, Fontana. This is one little way I can say THANK YOU!

About a week or so ago I went with one of my friends and her son to clinic, yes the same clinic Jacob knew for 3 ½ years. I thought maybe it would nice to say hi to every one :0/ Before we even got to clinic we had to check in, Oh Man that was my first melt down. The normal ladies were there with their normal greeting and then out came “WHERE’S JACOB” ?? With the news I had to give her she was devastated, she ran around and gave me a hug and started to cry, well that was the end of that. I have not even made it up to the clinic yet. Needles to say clinic had its moments, but I got to see both Dr’s. It took a lot of strength to do that, and it took every ounce of my being from not turning around and running. But I am glad I got to stop in and say hi.

There was a Christmas party that Jacob and I went to this last Dec 2009, my girlfriend just this last past week sent over some pictures. I could not believe it, this was the last pic Jacob and I took together, it just tore me up, but SO SPECIAL! Thank You Cathy!!

Mommy & Jacob Dec 12, 2009

Thank You for the continued prayers!

Events to Remember:

Farmer Boys / Blood Drive Fundraiser
Friday June 18, 2010 2 to 7 pm

Friday June 23, 2010 4 to 9 pm

Join us for an important cause, help me HELP WIPE OUT CANCER!
A great family fun night.
Saturday July 17, 2010
Choose your session 6-8 pm OR 8-10 pm
$20.00 Adult / $15.00 Child
Top striker raffel, additional raffels & goody bags

You can e-mail me at for flyers or go and if you want to register for Bowling please do that also. Please if any one is interested in bowling PLEASE reggister, I booked two session hoping that this event would be a great success, FOR A GREAT CAUSE!!!! PLEASE, I WOULD LOVE TO SEE YA THERE!